need a friend - or a nice word!!

I am desperate.

I am desperate becasue I have received two disappointing notes from two people I thought of as close to me.
I am desperate because I only seem to have disappointing experiences since I came back, and I cannot think positively about the things to come after I really have to come back.

I've changed.

First people took a note of my hair. Wow, it's got long. Well, yeah, that's what happens when a person doesn't have a haircut in a couple of months. But, now at least, some of them can be happy - if I am not. They have always told me that I'd look a lot better with long hair - there you go!! I still have the same thoguhts about this: one time I like it, at some other time I could kill for a pair of scissors (well, okay, probably not for scissors but for a hairdresser).
Especially because yersterday, thru my journey to the past, I saw a footage of me from, wait, 5 years ago and I just loved my hair back then. It was so comfortable that way and, I think, it look good. So, how many more days do I have to have that hair-cut?? :)

second thing: I am told to be more direct (not that I would have had problems in this respect before). no sensitivity!!!! :) or sensibility???

I will have a tough talk with someone today
two meetings with my friends tomorrow
a phone call to be made the day after tomorrow
a travel to my birth-town next week
a probable stay-over at an old-odl friend's house (oh, the spaghetti!!)
a meeting with an artist!!! :), who will tease me with my directing!! :)

btw, I have just been interrupted by two very miserable guys at the computer center. They wanted to download something, but they didn't have the time to register, so they asked me if they could use the service. I said okay - in the meanwhile I wanted to make some calls, but they were soooooooo... though one said that he was registered before, he didn't know how t download and save the documents. Anyhow, in the end, they wanted to invite me for something for my kindness! did I go????
no!!!!!!! :)
I know, I know, this is like the train/tram guy, but come on!

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