when you think it can get worse....

then the heart beats again. louder and stronger than before. I can feel the blood running through the veins, pumping in and out and through the heart. my skin feels cold. but not from the outside. from the inside. I'm trembling.

how much longer? for how much longer can this last?

i don't know when we lost it. i start to wonder if we'd ever had it at all.